Friday, November 2, 2012

Thankful: Day 2

Day 2- I'm Thankful for bad parenting.

I know, I know. Some of you are sitting there re-reading that and going "Say wha?!" but hear me out....

My past is no secret, my family life is no secret and my struggles with acceptance and family drama is especially no secret. I spent so much of my life being bitter, angry, discouraged and often times just rebellious until I got married and then things started changing for me.

Now that I'm a mom and wife and have been shown what a real family is with my amazing in-loves I no longer have all these painful feelings or fears I struggled with. I've cut ties with the majority of my family simply because they will never be alright with me NOT being part of the drama and cycle they seemingly love to stay in, not too mention my overwhelming need to mother or help out or give advice always seemed to backfire and I seemed to forever be to blame for everything when all I did was try to help. I thought it would be hard but in reality, I have NEVER been as happy, positive or motivated or just relieved or accepting of who I am as I have been in the last year. It's amazing and it clearly shows in me on the inside and out.

So yes, I am THANKFUL for Bad Parenting. To my birth parents who just couldn't get it right and made poor choices repeatedly which in the end resulted in their children being separated and lives being more difficult than most. I am Thankful. I'm Thankful for the harsh upbringing, the struggles and all. It helped me become who I am today, it instilled such a fear in me to stay on the right path( not that I always followed it), fight for what I wanted in and for my life and to not settle on being what so many assumed I would be simply because of who my birth parents were. Without their mistakes I doubt my life would be as blessed as it is now, I doubt I'd be as great of a mom as I am if I didn't strive to be the mother I wish I had growing up. I wouldn't have married the most amazing man whose faith in me even when I was broken has restored so much and has made me strong. I just have so much to Thank them for rather than blame them for, I wasted too much of my life thinking the opposite.

1 comment:

  1. I understand where you're coming from and commend you for learning from your parents' mistakes and for having the strength to cut toxic ties.



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