*insert pity party title here*

I swear I am by no means a hermit, nor am I using Avery as a cop-out on my social standards but it just seems like since the last half of my pregnancy til now....I have lost touch with about 80% of my friends.

She's 14 weeks old now and I still have friends who have yet to see her!!!! People who were around me all the time when I was pregnant with her and now......no where to be found.

It seems this is my only whiny issue of sorts, I feel guilty but at the same time I feel hurt that people have pretty much just not bothered to call me or see me or ask about her or come see her! I'm aware it's a two way street here, I know I lack in the "return your call" catogory and usually it's due to me being tired or busy with her but now....I almost stare at the phone trying to will it to ring.

I even tried to have a Girls Night Out at the urging of Evan and out of 32 ladies invited....1 RSVP'd......ONE, UNO........if that doesn't hurt you I don't know what would.....

Okay I'm not being negative, just venting. I am about to get crazy busy with our program opening Wed. but I just keep getting these moments of pity and after I get over it, I get annoyed and then crabby so I just needed to vent it.

I am also missing my camera cord so I can't upload the pics from Eureka we took yesterday, bummer. Avery had a great time and grand dad came and took pics of us as a family. Today she sat outside with me as Evan mowed and now has hay fever....ugh, her allergies are so annoying and I feel so stupid for not thinking about her being out there while he was cutting the grass.

Plus side: She is sleeping. BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE!

...She's sleeping in her crib!

YEAH!

 That's what you read....she is sleeping in her crib. She took a nap in it sat. for about 2 hours for the first time ever and now she is sleeping in it again, not sure if for the night though, Evan isn't quite ready for her to be in her room alone. *Sigh* I'm ready and so is she....daddy is another story...

Sometimes music gets it for you.

Do you ever come across a song or album that just....moves you?

I, being the music lover I am have always gone from one album to the next looking for some hidden meaning behind lyrics or melodies that just make me think. If a song captivates me and gets me thinking, I am hooked.

I currently feel this way about a new Album I have slowly added through iTunes. I was first introduced to Brooke Fraser through Hillsong United. The girl can sing! Her song "Hosanna" and "Lead me to the cross" on their album is insane and became a part of my life when I was dealing with a lot.

Brooke came out with her own album called "Albertine" I only have 4 songs from it but I am finishing up the album soon.

Here are the lyrics to my current song obsession.

C . S. Lewis Song.-

If I find in myself desires nothing in this world can satisfy,

I can only conclude that I was not made for here.

If the flesh that I fight is at best only light and momentary,

Then of course I'll feel nude when to where I'm destined I'm composed

Speak to me in the light of the dawn

Mercy comes with the morning

I will sigh and with all creation groan as I wait for hope to come for me

Am I lost or just less found?On the straight or on the roundabout of the wrong way?

Is this a soul that stirs in me,is it breaking free, wanting to come alive?

Cause my comfort would prefer for me to be numb

And avoid the pending birth of who I was born to become

Speak to me in the light of the dawn

Mercy comes with the morning

I will sigh and with all creation groan as I wait for hope to come for me

For we, we are not long here

Our time is but a breath, so we better breathe it

and I, I was made to live, I was made to love, I was made to know you

Hope is coming for me

Hope, He's coming

I love this song........

How is God moving in you?

-Britt

pictures of one day

Avery had such a wonderful day. The weather was night today and she spent plenty of time outside enjoying it with us. Here's a few pictures I liked the best out of oh so many taken today!

Avery and her grand dads feet. I think if it was B&W I would frame it in her room...

She loves the feel of the sun on her face, she always looks up to it and the wind when she's outside.

Grand Dad and Avery in the back yard.

She has SOOOOOOO many different faces I'm always finding them while trying to capture her elusive smile, Gary aka- Grand dad took 5 pictures of her today and this was the first shot...THE SMILE!

She sits up on her own now, so chill just sits on the chair or on the couch with us and is content.

This is my new FAVE picture of her. I love it!

We went for a long walk at Eureka, she sat in her stroller for the first time and ended up sleeping for over half the walk. OIY! But, atleast she no longer has to stay in her car seat in the travel system, she actually gets to look around and enjoy the view.

BTW- Last night was sooo much fun, I have blisters on my feet from walking on Henderson Ave in Dallas with our group, yeah I forgot how to walk in heels apparently but it was sooo worth it. I loved the sushi place and even had a apple-tini that was SO good. after sushi we walked down the street to The Pearl Cup, a newly opened coffee shop and had coffee on the patio. I had a mango green tea smoothie, it was so good. After we got back to Denton I picked up Avery and went to iHop to meet Stacy and her sister Becca for coffee and for them to see Avery. It was also Stacy's birthday.

Yeah, I got in around 2am with Avery, She slept the  majority of the time we were with the Chadwell sister. Such a good girl.

None of us went to church, Nan is sick, Evans allergies are horrible, Avery slept til 11am!, Gary was under the weather and I was exhausted so we all slept in then watched Bolt and Twilight and then enjoyed the outdoors since it was so beautiful outside (evan, Avery and I). Very much needed Veg day.

*sigh* does it have to be monday tomorrow?

Saturday Night !

I'm so so SO excited.

Avery will be with Miss Carolynn tonight and Evan and I get to get to go out with friends to Dallas for his best friend, Nick's, 25th birthday. We're going to a neat place called Sushi Axiom.

I've never had sushi before so this will be interesting, not to mention I get to dress up and *gasp* wear makeup!

Yeah, I know, it's the little things.......

I'm so ready for spring to make up it's mind here. Poor Evan and Avery, their allergies are so bad this week. Texas weather is just so loopy and up in the air you never know what you'll get one week to the next. I can't wait until she's 6 months then we can actually give her something besides tylenol for her allergies.

3 month picture

I forgot to add a picture of munchkin at 3 months! Enjoy!

Plastic bag...plastic bag...

Avery is now 3 months old.

I seriously can't believe how big she is and how fast time is just zooming by the 3 of us. It always seems to catch me by surprise on the 19th of each month even though I'm totally aware of it coming.

She's sitting up on her own, sleeping through the night, cooing up a storm, smiles 23/7 even in her sleep! She's figuring out how to stand on her feet when we hold her as well as how to hold her bottle by herself and she is trying to laugh/giggle but she seems to scare herself once she hears the odd sound coming out of her. She holds her head up so well and has awesome control for her age.

I know, if I had feathers they'd be so puffed out right now......

I have oddles and oddles of pictures and videos of her on my FB account so add me if you'd like.

Shameless plug, I know.

Well, short post for tonight/morning. It's 2:07 am and I am still up and cleaning while her and Evan are snoozing, must be nice.

Evan is 25 now.

We're going to TN in June.

SO EXCITED!

the.END.

word.

Still getting the hang of this site, so much to learn!!!

Be patient with me.

Anyone know how I can make an awesome picture template as seen on here from www.thecutestblogontheblock.com

-Britt

Cause I'm a MOM that's why......

*Sigh* I miss being pregnant... I truly loved my belly...

I love how lately in life I am having more "A-HA!" moments.

 Little things captivate my mind and reel me into those deep "This is Life." conversations with God and I'm just so giddy over them. I know it's mainly because of Avery.....watching her experience life is just insane and knowing that I am her essential window to reality is even more insane. She is changing every day and is like a sponge! You see her react to the wind on her face for the first time, you hear her giggle when she hears her dad or Grand-dads voice, Her eyes light up or follow something....

It's just hard to understand people that say there is no God when you watch a baby learn about the world. How can anyone say there is no God? I promise you, have a child or watch a child born into this world and you will quickly see that there is no denying it.

I also find is utterly amazing how much I have changed as a person in 11 weeks. I think I knew deep down as soon as we found out we were pregnant again that I would start living and searching for Christ more and now it isn't as much of a struggle as it has been in the past. I've never had a rebel side to my faith, I always stayed positive and I still believe God knew what he was doing in allowing us our first pregnancy and taking it away the way he did, there is no anger, no regret, I gave that all to him but it did change me, it did affect me negatively and it did make me question my faith and it's validity.

I never strayed but I wasn't in it so to speak.....yet, I was that rock and pillar of strength and wisdom and nurturing for Evan on a spiritual level while he was my foundation and strength on a emotional and physical level. He knew I wasn't me and he allowed me to do my own thing but he still was my anchor.

When we were blessed with our second pregnancy and Averys arrival I prayed constantly, I was also so afraid that God wouldn't let me keep her like her did with our first pregnancy. I didn't want to get emotionally involved in the pregnancy, I told friends and family but regretted it. I paniced over everything I did or didn't do. Yet, I laid it all down to God and just told myself to be thankful for anytime he gives me with my baby.

Now here I am. I'm a mother to a BEAUTIFUL baby girl who couldn't be a bigger blessing or a miracle in herself. I'm at one of the peaks of my walk with Christ and am just or rather I feel just as much of a newborn as Avery in my walk. It's like the beginning of a new relationship, the first drop of a rollercoaster, the butterflies in the stomach, the seeing everything new and shiny and having no fear type of adrenaline.

When I get to share something with Avery and watch her innocence take it all in and witness her reactions I can't help but see me in front of God and him beaming down at me the way I beam down at her. That deep and breathtaking Awe is just so amazing and also bittersweet.

I hope this newness never fades.....

Mommy moments that I wish could not happen...

My house currently smells like Vicks vapor rub. Avery is sound asleep after yet another rough day. Poor baby, she's had a cough for 4 days now, a cough that we first noticed last Sunday night and brought to her pedi's attention during her 2 month check up. We also brought it up again on Thursday when we went due to her being awake for 40 hours straight and not eating more than 2 ounces at a time due to acid reflux.

Again.....they said it wasn't anything.

So then this weekend Avery got allergies out of nowhere!!! Runny nose, itchy, watery eyes, sneezing and coughing. We're pretty sure it's due to Evans parents long haired cat, Evan has issues with Matt too and Evans dad was suffering from the weird weather bringing in lots of mountain cedar...soooo glad I don't deal with this.

Ugh, I hate seeing her so miserable.

I've also learned that there isn't much they can do for her at this age for allergies or the common cold and carenow will not see any baby under 3 months...whoo hoo! *sarcasm* So here we are with a humidifier,saline drops, axid (89$ antacid), Vicks baby rub (only on her nightgown collar due to her being under 3 months) and a new soft pillow to elevate her head so she can sleep (which she is doing barely).

I'm exhausted. I'm just on pins and needles over her and barely able to function at work. Yes, indeed, I have entered mommyhood full force.

She makes me so darn happy, how blessed I am. Enjoy the pic of us from yesterday after her belly time/mirror time. Thanks for sticking around for this vent session, hopefully I can go to sleep now and feel human in the morning.

Greetings & Salutations

Hello fellow Bloggers and Blogettes:

Giving this a go along with FB,Myspace,Xanga & LJ....apparently I'm not too preoccupied with Munchkin enough to stop me from my crazy blog addiction.  Although I'm never on LJ, hardly update Xanga and myspace is more for pictures and keeping up with the Jones'. FB, well...that's a different story ::Le-Sigh::

Currently trying to watch the Dark Knight with Evan while Munchkin is asleep, i'm failing at it. Evan forgives me though. :P

while you are checking me out, give Evans AMAZING aunt a looksie!

 www.hollybaxley.com

That woman has a way with words through Gods grace that is astounding and beyond words sometimes, makes you want to be a better witness and to testify more.

Ah, the movie is getting more POW-ey as I like to call it, off I go to hang with the hubby. Thanks for the time, I'll post more interesting posts soon.

Enjoy the pic of munchkin I'll be putting one up with every post, call it the new mommy thing I do.

Xoxo-

Brittnye