Struggles

Anyone else still struggling with the news of Robin Williams death?

I find it so interesting how one person can effect so many people, a stranger no less. Sure, he was a high profile celebrity with a resume a mile long, but hardly any of us personally knew him, and yet here we are mourning with those who actually did know him personally.

He had a way with humor. He brought joy, laughter and so many times outside of the movies, a sense of grace and humbleness most of those in Hollywood fail to possess. His charity causes and USO appearances were hugely under noted in his career but ask those who know of it and they can tell you that he was a man who took pride in the military and never hesitated to help children with cancer or rare diseases.

Then of course were his dark periods. It should be no surprise about his battles with addiction and alcohol. He was open and candid about them and was never one to boast about defeating his demons when he went through the public process of handling them and succeeding it would seem. But apparently, he couldn't defeat the biggest one he had.

Depression is a very real issue in the world. It effects more people than any other known disease (And yes, that IS what it is, not a state of mind or an emotion).People struggle daily with it and in many ways, both mentally and physically. You can't just stop being depressed, there is no switch to turn it off and on. Oddly enough statistics show that most outwardly happy people suffer from it. The humor is a facade, a decoy so to speak to keep the denial at bay and make people not notice.

This year I have had to personally deal with a death that was a result of depression. Yes, it was a suicide. However, I don't believe suicide to be the cause of death in that situation. Just as I refuse to say that Robin Williams died of suicide. He didn't. Nor did my friend of 11yrs whom I spoke with just a day before he passed away. Depression is what they died of.

Depression is a complicated Mental illness. It affects at least 35 million people in the USA alone. Chances are, you know someone struggling with it. Chances are, they've reached out to you once or twice. Chances are, you said the same thing they get told by the ones closest to them.

I hope he found peace at last.


-Brittnye

September Already!? :)

I feel like such a broken record with my poor blog. I could have sworn I updated a few times in August but apparently I didn't! Same with my HLC blog which I'm starting to wonder was worth all the hype but I know it's just the pregnancy and summer-ness getting to me on that end.

SO much to catch up on and I warn you now you oh-so-AMAZING reader, I've got much to update and just pour out about. Maybe need to hash things out in a 2-parter and just keep this entry as simple as possible.

Life at the Hartfield casa seems to finally be slowing down after a busy summer. We just got back from a weekend trip with Evans parents (always and I mean ALWAYS fun being with those two amazing people!). Avery started school this week too which means new routine and schedule and not too mention a little free time for mommy and daddy.

Check out my big girl!!!

She is Blessed with two awesome teachers this year and I just can not tell you how EXCITED Evan and I are that she gets to have this experience. She really loves her school and the 1st week is done and she already has made new friends! She's also ridiculously taller than her classmates.....

We had 2 more foster litters come and go and we even got our sweet mama kitty, Layla adopted! I know it sounds dumb but after having her be at our fence, deck and slowy into our home after 2 years, I kinda didn't expect her to get adopted and she was adopted just 2hrs after I took her to the shelter!! When I was notified about her adoption, I sobbed. I'm talking...wailed! Boo-hooed and did the full blown ugly cry. I loved her and was so used to her ALWAYS being with us even though she really wasn't ours. After the last kitten was gone it took me 3 days to realize I wasn't hearing kittens or needing to get up and feed them. Paris and Gus are sure happy and Evan has asked that I not bring home anymore Little's until after our own new little arrives. :)


Speaking of our Little.....

IT'S A GIRL!!!!!

We are having ANOTHER girl! We found out 2wks ago and are super excited. For now she is referred to as "Little Miss" since we are not sharing her name until she is born. (I told 2 friends on accident and Evan told his parents so now we are being VERY strict with this rule!) Sadly, this is the best sono pic I have so far but I have my anatomy scan on Tuesday so hopefully I will get a better pic to share.

I'm 21wks today! Crazy to think we are already half way there! I started feeling her at 16wks but as of last week she has decided to let me know EVERY move she makes! With Avery it was a few stretches in my ribs and hiccups but this one....she's a roly poly!! Usually around 7am and 10pm she is most active and I am loving every second of it. I'll get a 20wks picture uploaded soon and show my 14wk/16wk & 20wk belly shots. :)

So far we know she has her daddy's booty, chin and profile, just like Avery did. She is super long and has little feet.

I'm finally getting the reality of it I think. I've been telling people how weird it is for me to be so lax about EVERYTHING with this pregnancy but once we found out SHE was a SHE I started planning and thinking and list making. Evan and I went to Babies R Us and started a registry, we've got her and Averys room laid out so I know where to start from there. I just wish I could narrow things down and stop being so indecisive. SO much has changed on the market since we had Avery and we both feel weird about asking people to buy Little Miss gifts for her shower which.....hasn't even been planned or talked about and I'm not even sure if I'm having one.

Her colors are Gray and Lilac with no theme for her nursery. I'm just going for colors and patterns. Super Hartfield, I know. ;)

Alright, that should do for a sufficient update. I'll get belly pics and another update out and about before the weekend hits full throttle.

Thanks for sticking with me and my lazy, nonblogging self.

-Brittnye

Thankful Pt.3

Today is THANKSGIVING. I'm going to finish my Thankful list and then post another entry for today after it's officially over (why I am up at 2:30am is beyond me).

• Day 15- I am THANKFUL for God's Creativity: Driving my commute from Fort Worth to Denton I pick up little pieces of just how creative God can be. The changing of the leaves from season to season with such vivid and eye catching colors, to wonderful tapestry like sunsets and a wide variety of wildflowers in bloom all make you wonder how he did it all.

• Day 16- I am THANKFUL for Laughter and the simple joys in life.

• Day 17- I am THANKFUL for my Blog. Having a little space all for myself to vent, blab, ponder, share and enjoy the same from sweet friends is an escape for me as well as a fountain of wisdom and helpful dose of staying in the know with some VIP's and I love it.

• Day 18- I am THANKFUL for my Kittos. Paris and Gus have been my confidants, crying companions, parenting skill trainer, loyal companions, alarm clocks and selfless affection hoggers for 5 years. They are so different from one another but both have unique personalities and I know to some they are just cats but these two are my fur-children and have been with me through thick and thin and have picked me up when I was down and made me mad when I was apparently too happy :P. No matter what's going on I know I am needed by them and that's a comfort.

• Day 19- I am THANKFUL for CARBS. Yeah, I said it. I can never turn down an amazing fresh bread. Who cares about calories or fat. Enjoy life. Eat Bread.

• Day 20- I am THANKFUL for Music. Sometimes a Song can say what we can't and other times a song can take us back down memory lane or put in to perspective something we couldn't. It has the ability to soothe us and move us.

• Day 21- I am THANKFUL for TEACHERS. I'll share a few who influenced me growing up: Ms. Donna Larusso (Schroader), Ms. Judy Palermo, Mrs. Susan O'Rear, Ms. Pam Lane, Mrs. Susan Curtis, Mr. Paul Tagliabue, Mr. Mark Baker, Ms. Cheryl Ellis, Mr. Joel Hayes, Mrs. Jeanean Abney, Mr. Scott Gibson, Ms.Georgeanne Burlage, Mr. Doc Bowman(RIP), Mr. Luke Frels, Mr. Tracy Heron, Mr. Mark Kammon. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU. For all you do and have done for all the students you have had and to all the teachers out there who are making a difference in a childs life.

• Day 22- I am THANKFUL to live in The United States of America.

• Day 23- I am THANKFUL for the roof over my head. It may not be the best place, it may be small and cramped but it keeps me warm, safe, dry and gives me a place to call home and a place to raise my daughter and to make memories for her to cherish when she is older.

• Day 24- I am THANKFUL for YOU.

• Day 25- I am THANKFUL for THANKSGIVING. To help remind me once a year just how richly blessed I am in life and how Thankful I am to have such amazing people surrounding me with love and wisdom, friendship and laughter and how it helps me to not lose those things for which can easily be taken for granted.

Blessings, Love and lots of Turkey today,
Britt & Co.